STEP 2: CUT THE SHIT - No More News or Toxic People
Updated: Nov 3, 2022
There were 6 main steps I took to UNFUCK myself, this is step 2...
So... I hit rock bottom, realised I had to change my MINDSET and DECIDED that I was going to do whatever it fucking takes to heal my knee pain, shake off the feeling of depression and get my life back, the next step I took was to start cutting out all the unnecessary NEGATIVE shit in my life. To read about the mental and physical struggles that lead me to this point go check out my blog CHANGE YOUR MINDSET – CHANGE YOUR LIFE if you haven't already done so. I recommend doing this before reading on as it will give context.
One of the most simple and surprisingly effective things I ever did to improve my life was simply stop watching, reading or listening to the news.
I was never one who gave much time to it but I did have the TV on every morning before going to work and the news would be on the morning show I watched and the other way I would see it would be in the newspapers (I used to buy UK tabloid paper The Daily Star every morning on the way to work to read the football news and flick through the rest of it during lunchtime).
I knew the news just told you nothing but depressing and negative things and very little good news but I really didn't think it would affect me much until I actually cut it out of my life completely around 2015-16 after reading THE SECRET and deciding to completely change my MINDSET and be willing to try new things and do whatever it takes to heal my chronic knee pain and the anxiety and depression that came with it.
The first time I thought about cutting out the news was after reading Fieldy from KORN's autobiography GOT THE LIFE – My Journey of Addiction, Faith, Recovery & Korn. When Fieldy was getting clean from alcohol and drugs and trying to turn his own life around he talked about how he was told to cut out as much negativity as possible and that cutting out the news was one of those things.
Most people don't realise (I didn't) how much hearing and absorbing negative shit every day really affects your mental state and brings you down. Your SUB-CONSCIOUS MIND absorbs everything you expose it to!
It wasn't until a few weeks after completely cutting it out of my life that I realised this as I started to feel better mentally. A bit less stressed.
"News is to the brain what sugar is to the body! ...It's toxic to your health!"
The fact is you don't NEED the news in your life.
You don't not NEED informed of all the negative shit they bombard you with day in, day out and if you think “oh I need to know what's happening in the world” ask yourself is it REALLY helping you?
Name all the times where hearing the news truly benefited you and improved your life? Truth is, it's WASTING YOUR TIME!
The news you hear is nearly always BAD NEWS and gives the impression that we live in a fucking terrible, horrible world full of bad people. Who the fuck really wants to hear bad news every day?... apparently most people.
This makes no sense to me. Like those people who constantly read the obituaries – how about focusing more on actually living your life rather than who's dead!
I get that we are wired to pay more attention to negative and dangerous things as a survival mechanism so we can't just ignore bad things that happen but we many experts say we weren't built to endure this constant bombardment of bad news day in, day out so it can leave us constantly stressed out and affect out physical health too.
A lot of what you read, hear and even see, especially from the mainstream media, is bullshit or if there is truth in it, it's portrayed in a way that doesn't accurately represent what's REALLY going on.
Yes terrible things happen and there are bad fucking people in the world BUT you need to realise there are a lot of good people and amazing things happening all the time that you don't hear of unless you go looking for them.
After reading Fieldy's book, reading THE SECRET, listening to various successful people on podcasts etc and becoming aware of how negative shit every day can impact you, it was a no-brainer for me.
I believe it's like most unhelpful behaviours we are all guilty of, we're conditioned to believe this is normal and this is what you do, it's just part of life, when really it's up to YOU to take responsibility and do what will benefit you and your health every day.
Don't forget that at the end of the day these big media companies are businesses. Businesses need to make money so they will broadcast whatever gets the biggest ratings so they can make more money and as humans were attracted to negative news so it makes sense for them put out shit that will get the most attention.
This is why they put up shocking headlines and make things out to be even worse or more dramatic than they actually are.
Concern for your well-being or whether it's actually helpful to you doesn't play a part in it!
If something that important happens or you need to know about it, trust me you'll hear about it from someone else and you can then go look into it for yourself if it's something that will truly affect your life.
Before I started making big changes to my mindset, habits and life in general back in 2015 I was in a constant state of knee pain, constantly feeling anxious, depressed or stressed out and like my life was going nowhere and I KNEW I desperately needed to make changes.
My head was full of negative thoughts day and night, and the way I had been thinking and things I had been doing clearly were not working but I decided I wasn't going to give up and cutting out as much negativity out of my life as possible was one of the first steps I took.
As well as the news, another thing I found that really helps is cutting toxic people out of your life, or at least minimising the time you spend with them. By toxic people I mean those are not adding anything to your life but are a bad influence on you, bringing you down or holding you back in some way. These could be “friends,” work colleagues, family members, people in a shop, pub or club you go to or even someone you're in a relationship with.
These aren't necessarily bad people. It could be people who constantly moan and complain about everything and see the negative in EVERY situation. You don't need to hear that shit constantly as it fuckin' drains you. If you're husband, wife, boyfriend or girlfriend is guilty of this or treats you badly you need to confront them, make them aware of it and ask them to stop it or tone it down. If they refuse then maybe they're not the one for you. You need to get rid of them.
Personally, I would rather be by myself than with someone who doesn't treat my right or add to my life. You KNOW deep down whether you really want to be with that person or not – don't just stay with them because it's convenient or you're afraid of being lonely because you'll never be happy living a lie.
If you're trying to quit or cut down on drinking, drugs and partying then you need to stay away from parties, places and the people who lead you back to that, especially if you're easily persuaded.
If people you work with really bring you down or constantly piss you off and can't be reasoned with, then request to be moved to a different department if that's an option or start looking for a new job – the change might seem scary but it could be just what you need and lead to amazing new opportunities.
If there's people in your life who laugh at you, bring you down, rubbish your ideas every time you talk about your dreams or things you want to achieve then get fuckin' rid of them, spend no more time with them. You don't have to have a big argument just cut them out of your life.
You might find, that when you want to make positive changes and start aiming higher you might find that some people start to criticise, laugh or put you down because they feel insecure (especially when they see your improvements). You improving your life and growing may make them feel bad for not doing more to improve their own life.
If you have a big goals or dreams they may tell you it's not possible.
They may tell you to forget about it because THEY don't believe THEY are capable of achieving those things so why should you.
Don't take it personally, just cut people like this out or spend as little time as possible with them and don't even mention your goals to them.
If they're willing to listen you could try encouraging them to make some changes but if not, fuck it, don't waste too much time on trying to help people who don't want to help themselves.
Focus on surrounding yourself with people who are more positive and constantly want to push themselves forward, people who can help and inspire you!
TIME TO TAKE ACTION! So... after experiencing the benefits of doing these things myself I recommend you CHALLENGE yourself to cut out ALL news for ONE WEEK and avoid or spend as little time with negative people and see how you feel.
When you manage that, challenge yourself to do it for a full month! If you can do that long I've no doubt you'll feel better for it so just keep it up!
Spend as much of your time and energy as possible doing things that IMPROVE your health, make you stronger mentally and physically, help you learn and grow in every way and generally make you happier and improve your life!
...but remember you don't have to do it all at once!
Take it STEP BY STEP like I did. Don't underestimate the power of making simple changes and creating new habits. Over time they can help completely turn your life around.
In the mornings before work or having breakfast I started watching motivational videos and podcasts on YouTube that inspired me to think and live more positively.
Any time I was driving to work or out walking at lunchtime I'd be listening to awesome music (rock, metal or hardcore of course!) or listening to more podcasts and at night time watch some comedy after I finished working out.
I'll go into all the things I started watching and listening to in more detail in my next blog PMA - A NEW FOUND POWER!
If you're thinking none of these things will make any difference go back to STEP 1 – CHANGE YOUR MINDSET and be willing to try anything and everything to improve your life.
If you're unhappy and struggling (like most of the people around you) then clearly what you've been doing and the way you've been thinking hasn't been working!
GIVE IT A GO and feel free to message me through the BORN 2 BLEED Facebook or Instagram page or email me and let me know how you get on!
It worked for me so it can work for you if you're ready to make the effort! can fucking do this! I know you can!
Changing your life and developing new habits isn't always easy but it CAN be done and it IS worth it! Hang in there, BELIEVE you can do it and...
NEVER GIVE UP! Steve
“You're life won't change for the better until you do!” - Jack Canfield STEP 1: CHANGE YOUR MINDSET – CHANGE YOUR LIFE!
STEP 2: CUT THE SHIT – No More News or Toxic People!
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